The True Meaning of Self-Care

Prioritising ‘OUR-self’ is what allows us to be our ‘WHOLE-self’.

The Choice Point

When we experience burnout, stress and/or feelings of insecurity, we face a ‘choice point’. Either we can choose to stay stuck in past behaviours or we can choose life affirming behaviours such as self-care.

Many people believe that self-care is selfish and indulgent. But in fact, self-care enables us to be better placed to help others in an ongoing way. Take the safety instruction we are given when flying. “Place the mask over your own mouth and nose before assisting others”. If we do not look after ourselves first, we are not able to help others.

However, self-care should not only be about helping others. It is also about seeing yourself as a valuable human being worthy of self-care behaviours.

Refusing Victimhood

Choosing to take care of ourselves means that we are actively choosing to become the author of our lives, instead of giving in to victimhood. We refuse to let work or responsibilities or other people’s bad behaviour ruin our lives. Importantly, by bringing a sense of balance into our lives, we teach and exercise our minds to handle stressors in a more productive way. Incorporating self-care on a regular basis, helps to maintain and enhance our health and wellbeing.

Real Self-Care

Self-care does not mean sitting on a beach in Hawaii, with a face mask on, waiting for a massage. Real self-care is much more than that. It is about taking actions for your personal growth and development.

Whilst there is no ‘one-size-fits-all’ to self-care, the common thread for all successful self-care efforts is that it involves a commitment to one’s overall well-being in a consistent and ongoing manner.

Ways to Exercise Self-Care

Self-care means setting boundaries and being able to say ‘no’. Be accepting of who you are. It is important to recognise your limits and know how much you can take on before your ‘resilience balloon’ pops.
Self-care means taking care of your body. Are you getting enough sleep? Are you feeding yourself with nutrient-dense food and keeping hydrated throughout the day? You are in control of your life. Self-care means integrating health into your daily routine to help you feel more energised.
Self-care means having alone time. Whether it be going for a walk, going to the gym, or enjoying a book with a hot cup of tea, engaging in alone time without technology (for even 20 minutes a day) can help you to calm your mind and re-focus.
Self-care means giving thought to a challenging work situation. Have a think about what you can do to make your work life a little less stressful. Are you working unsustainable hours? Are you taking sufficient breaks? It might be worth approaching your employer/supervisor to discuss ways to make your work life more enjoyable.

Re-Cap

Self-care means paying attention to yourself. You are being cared for by you.

If you are reading this, and have neglected your self-care in the past, it is time to act and incorporate self-care activities and practices into your daily life. If you do practice self-care, take a moment to re-evaluate and look for ways of improving. What are your stress points and does your self-care address them?

Choosing to prioritise ‘our-self’ is what ultimately allows us to be our ‘whole-self’.

References

Butler, L. D., Mercer, K. A., McClain, K, Horne, D.M., & Dudley, M. (2019). Six domains of self-care: Attending to the whole person. Journal of Human Behavior in the Social Environment, 29(1), 107-124. https://doi.org/10.1080/10911359.2018.1482483

By Renee Mill|2022-07-14T12:29:32+10:00August 10th, 2021|Self-care|

About the Author: Renee Mill

Renee Mill -- Anxiety Solutions CBT Director, Principal Clinical Psychologist, Supervisor and Best Selling Author -- has counseled hundreds of individuals, couples and families for over 30 years. She cares deeply about her clients and has created a warm and safe environment for all thrive. Renee has worked intensely on creating a new technique for dealing with generalised anxiety disorder, social anxiety, fear of public speaking, performance anxiety and panic attacks. Renee’s other key areas of interest are depression, relationships and couple therapy, self-worth, parenting, resilience and well-being. Renee has published 3 best selling books and lectured in Australia, China, Israel, the United States and South Africa. She is well known on the speaker’s circuit and is often called upon by the media for her professional opinion. To hear Renee’s interviews or read her articles have a look at our Media Section.