The first time I went for therapy, I had no idea what to expect and what the experience would be like. The only image I had was those found on TV, magazines and websites. The images on these platforms were good, but they did not portray therapy accurately. I was nervous and worried it would be a waste of time. After years of searching for information, chatting with therapists and other therapy goers, I learnt that many people who eventually go to therapy sessions, have the same feeling at first before getting committed. I also learned, that therapy experiences vary differently for everyone. Although there are misconceptions and myths that aren’t true, they aim at preventing people from attending sessions and receiving the benefits associated with therapy.
Finally, when I visited the therapists, the first thing I noticed after my first therapy session was, therapy doesn’t really help us feel better at first. Many people equate therapy with a spa where you enter tensed and leave refreshed and relaxed. Different from a spa, I realised that with therapy, you enter with a problem and leave with a greater understanding of severity, gravity and prevalence of our issues. We enter knowing we have one problem, but come out realising we have several more. This doesn’t make you feel better, instead you feel much worse. However, therapy isn’t supposed to leave you feeling worse and certainly not meant to leave you with additional problems.
Feeling worse after a therapy session is normal and ok. I felt a lot worse after my first therapy sessions, before I started feeling comfortable and better. I felt weak, severely depressed, vulnerable and ashamed of myself. I kept asking myself, how on earth was I letting myself get hurt by someone I knew nothing about except the fact she is my therapist? What I did not ask myself is how these sessions will help me.
Then I discovered that one of the most critical elements of therapy, is creating a bonding relationship with the therapist. After establishing a solid rapport between you and your therapist, you will be ready to embark on a truthful dialogue and a therapeutic journey that will open doors towards a secure therapist-client relationship. This relationship was the basis of me getting all the benefits I need from my therapy sessions. It worked for me, so will it for you, just try.